Saturday, September 26, 2009

Unique

I've been thinking quite a lot lately about the word "unique." This is due primarily to the fact I keep running into senior pastors, church staff pastors, and other people in ministry leadership roles who are convinced of how unique their church, vision, ministry, tradition, denomination is. While I don't know if any of them have actually used the word "unique" to describe just how special they are, they are definitely impressed with themselves and their very "unique" place in the kingdom of God.

So what does it mean to be unique in the first place? The word is defined as, "existing as the only one or the sole example; single; solitary in type or characteristics; having no like or equal; unparalleled, incomparable; limited in occurrence to a given class, situation or area." You and I both know plenty of pastors and churches that have deluded themselves into thinking their church/ministry fits these descriptions. This thinking stems from a level of arrogance that seems to be pandemic in the American church today. When you add to that arrogance the willful ignorance that causes a person or church to convince themselves they should pay no attention to what others in the Body of Christ are doing, you end up with a fractured spiritual landscape, full of competitive, narcissistic, and un-Christlike churches and ministries who are actually part of the larger cultural problem rather part of the cultural solution.

Some of the common statements of these types of churches include, "We don't care what the church down the street is doing, we're going to preach the gospel here (which is typically code for "the gospel according to us")," or "We are (fill in the name of the church/ministry/denomination) and we have no need to know what other churches/ministries/denominations are doing because they should be copying us, not the other way around." One of my favorites is, "We're not going to compromise the truth," which means those ministries who are doing things differently are automatically compromising the message of Jesus. This would all be funny if it weren't so blatantly full of self-worship. But, there's nothing funny about it.

When arrogance and ignorance collide, you end up with the statements and scenarios I've just described. The larger issue, of course, is why so many of us claim allegiance to the mystical, universal Body of Christ, but at the same time do everything within our power to separate ourselves from the rest of those who make up that Body. So, with that in mind, here is a brief open letter to all of the "leaders" of "unique" ministries out there:

Dear senior pastor/staff pastor/ministry leader,

I know you think you're unique. You're not. Stop it. I invite you to join with your brothers and sisters throughout the rest of Christ's Church so that together we can all be part of the solution.

Sincerely,

Your brother Jerry

Hmmm...unity. What a unique idea.

Monday, September 21, 2009

An old ex-friend

I ran into Certainty last week. I'd forgotten how hard he can punch. He was waiting for me in a class at a local university where I was guest-lecturing. Since I was lecturing at a Christian school, I knew that Certainty would probably make an appearance, but I guess I had forgotten how disagreeable Certainty can be. You see, Certainty and I used to be very good friends. In fact, I was one of his best promoters. But the day came when I began to realize that my faith was requiring something more than Certainty could deliver, something that made room for Discovery, Question, Wondering, as well as Mystery and Amazement. Certainty has no use for any of these guys and no use for anyone who might be willing to befriend them. So, Certainty told me I had to make a choice. I chose the journey to which I knew I was being invited, and Certainty and I went our separate ways.

This new journey required me to actually deepen my faith in Jesus, not abandon it. But, this deepening of faith also required me to let go of some things Certainty had insisted I hold on to. This letting go was neither easy or well-received. Certainty has lots of followers, and they don't respond very well to those of us who have felt a call to experiencing more of just Him and less of the stuff that may or may not be about Him. During this journey I have discovered that I had to make a choice: I could either follow Christ or I could follow the religion of Christianity, but I couldn't do both. I chose Christ. Not everybody has been excited about that choice. I don't care. The choice wasn't about them anyway.

Which leads me back to that classroom last week and my interaction (maybe more like a collision) with Certainty. He's still just as loud, just as insistent, just as willing to belittle and dismiss. But I also noticed he didn't have much company. In fact, he didn't have any company in the room. There were, however, several in the room who were hungry for more of Jesus, because they seemed to know that they could trust Jesus with their questions and wondering. I told one of them something I know to be absolutely true: Certainty will fail you. When it does, that's when the arms of Jesus are the most open and available. Of that I am certain.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Pneumonia

I've been sick for almost 3 weeks now with what has turned into pneumonia. I've never had pneumonia before, so even though I'm a novice where pneumonia is concerned, I can say with complete certainty that this sucks.

That's the extent of it. Now I'm out of breath.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Part of the Cure

A week ago last night I was in Atlanta at the Coldplay show. I've seen Coldplay before and I'll have to say they're my one of my two favorite bands (second only to a particular quartet from Dublin that I'll be seeing live later this year). This most recent Coldplay show was quite a bit different for me than the previous times I've seen them, however. I was at this show as a volunteer for OxFam America (www.oxfamamerica.org), an organization dedicated to serving those affected by extreme poverty, as well working to eradicate extreme poverty itself...as Nelson Mandela has said, poverty is not natural, but man-made, and therefore we can end it if we truly want to.

The purpose of our work at this show was to get as many Coldplay fans as possible to sign a petition that calls on President Obama and the Congress to devote more energy and resources to the issue of climate change, as climate change-related disasters affect the world's poor 20 TIMES MORE than the rest of us. Coldplay has been heavily involved with OxFam since the early days of the band, so a lot of Coldplay fans know about the work OxFam does, and are proud to be part of it.

We stood in the cool rain of the late afternoon and early evening getting fans to sign the petition while the warm-up bands (Howling Bells and Pete Yorn) played, and then joined several thousand of the rest of our friends on the lawn as Chris, Jonny, Guy and Will reminded us again why this music means so much to us. Then we were privileged to help hand out the band's brand new live cd that they're giving away for free at their shows and on their website. It was a lot of fun, not to mention exhilirating to be there working on behalf of those who are typically not heard, and therefore rely on voices like yours and mine to change their world.

But, the most important part of the night for me personally was not the show or the people who our team signed up for the cause. Instead, it was meeting a young woman named Soha, who is the OxFam rep on this leg of the Coldplay tour. She made sure we all knew everything we were supposed to know in order to make the most of our efforts as volunteers, plus she did a wonderful job making all of us feel welcome and important to the cause. She was born in Beirut, immigrated as a child to the U.S., and she grew up in Los Angeles.

As we were walking around the venue, she asked me what led me to become part of OxFam, as well as what kind of work I did. I told her that I do a few different things, which include being the co-founder and futurist for Second Life of Chattanooga (www.secondlifechattanooga.org), an organization dedicated to raising awareness about the issue of the sexual exploitation and trafficking of children in the U.S. She seemed very intrigued about how I came to be involved in such an issue, and I told her that a couple of years ago I heard someone in a meeting in Orlando briefly mention the issue of trafficking in the U.S. and I knew I had to do something about it.

Soha was amazed that hearing a couple of lines from someone in a meeting would cause me to take this kind of action. So amazed, in fact, that she told me she was doing a blog while on the tour, and she wanted to video me for it, letting me tell people briefly what Second Life is about, and how it fits with the mission of OxFam (the youtube link can be found at www.oxfam.org/coldplay and then look for the May 18th entry).

Once the show was over and we'd handed out the free cd's, put away all the info., taken down the OxFam tent and said goodbye to the rest of the team, Soha and I stood next to the seats where thousands had just been part of a great experience, and she had me talk for just a minute about why I was doing what I was doing on behalf of so many who are waiting for someone to set them free. As we walked out of the venue, Soha once again told me that she was inspired by my decision to do the kind of social justice work I'm doing. It was then that I told her I did this out of a sense of calling, and I finally let her know that I am a follower of Jesus, as well as a pastor.

I told her that I don't usually lead with this information, as it has a tendency to shut down dialogue because of the very crappy way so many Christians present themselves these days. Soha immediately began to tell me that she understood where I was coming from, as so many who share her Muslim faith have made it about nothing more than "the rules." We both talked about how we felt our respective faiths called us to something deeper and higher, and that we could be part of something better than our particular groups so often were known to be part of. Like those words from the Coldplay song "Clocks," we both find ourselves choosing to be, "...part of the cure," and not "...part of the disease."

We said our goodbyes, hoping to re-connect further on up the road. In the early morning hours of a rainy Monday in Atlanta, the young woman in the head-scarf from Los Angeles and the middle-aged man in the baseball cap and bandana from Tennessee were part of the cure. Thanks be to God.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Re-connecting

I heard from a long-time friend yesterday, someone I hadn't talked to in quite a few years. During college and for several years after he and I were closely connected and stayed in regular contact. As so often happens as we move through our lives, however, we lost touch after a while, and went several years without hearing from each other. But, through the wonders of Facebook (the social network that seems to be almost exclusively staked out by middle-aged people at this point), we found each other a little while ago, and yesterday we had out first real time, voice to voice conversation in quite a while.

It was one of those times that you've probably experienced before, as if we'd had taken a brief break in an already on-going conversation, and then picked it back up with, "Okay, so what was it you were saying?" We laughed in the same way, shared the same confidence and fear about life and ourselves, expressing some of the same hopes and doubts, only now through a middle-aged filter. God, it was so good to talk to him, this life-long friend of mine, the older brother I never had until he came into my life all those years ago. Some face to face time for later this year was discussed, and is greatly hoped for.

These re-connections always leave me wondering about both friendship and what it means to be the person I am. Friendship is a tricky thing, something I take very seriously, a fact that I have found over the course of my life places me in a minority. What most people call friendship is really nothing more than our being acquainted with certain surface facts about another person, all the while knowing little to nothing of the truth about that person, who they are in their most hopeful place, as well as in their darkest. One of my on-going frustrations is that it seems many people are satisfied with this surface acquaintance, as it makes the whole idea of friendship much more linear and sanitized than I believe it was ever meant to be. These surface acquaintances also allow others to rip you apart when the real truth of you, the one they never took the time to get to know, begins to come out, shattering not only their view of you, but also their view of themselves, pointing out the disconnect between what you might need from them and what they're willing, or maybe even equipped, to give another person.

When it comes to being myself, each time I re-connect with a true friend such as the one I spoke with yesterday, I can't help but be reminded of who I hoped to be all those years ago, as well as who I swore I'd never be, and how I've tricked myself a bit on both sides of that equation over the years. My friend yesterday reminded me that at least some, maybe even a lot, of the person who hoped to become certain things in his 20's still remains, only maybe the man in his 40's knows a bit more about what is worth becoming and what isn't than the guy in his 20's knew. He also reminded me that true friends also want to occupy the space of failure and it's accompanying pain with you, as the true friend knows that pain is sacred, but when shared becomes powerful and life-giving as well.

So, yesterday my friend and I gave a bit more oxygen to each other's dreams, as well as experienced a bit of the life that only pain can bring. We were and are two men still becoming, still hoping for the best, still believing we will find what it is we're looking for, and that we will celebrate those discoveries together.

It was great hearing from you JWD. It was also great to hear from myself.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Rocket Man

Shortly before my 9th birthday (back in the Stone Age of 1969), my dad asked me what gift ideas I had for that year. Since I knew we would be taking our regular summer trip to Florida to see my grandparents, and I knew when we would be there, I told him that I wanted him to take me to Cape Kennedy and let me see the launch of Apollo 11, the first manned space flight to the moon. My birthday is July 15, and the launch was scheduled for the 16th. That morning my dad, my grandfather, my younger brother and myself got up early and headed to the Cape to watch Armstrong, Collins and Aldrin take off on what at the time was considered by some to be an improbable and impossible trip. I can still clearly remember the sight of that space ship in the distance, the roar we heard and the shaking we felt as it lifted off, and then the way the rocket looked against that blue Florida sky. As a then 9 year-old boy, I was absolutely amazed at the sight, as was my then 30 year-old father and my then 52 year-old grandfather (I guess I wasn't paying attention to the reaction of my then 6 year-old brother). No matter what your age, to witness men climbing into a rocket with the intent to land on the moon was something by which you could not help but be amazed, especially if you were there to watch them begin the journey. A few days later, Neil Armstrong summed the whole thing up, as he took his first steps on the surface of the moon, calling it "one small step" for him, and "one giant leap" for the rest of us.

I have always been captivated by the idea of going far, of going where maybe no one else is willing to go, or even thinks possible to get to in the first place. Just this week I have been reminded of my own desire to fly, to explore and to be part of something that is a giant leap for not only myself, but many others. Maybe I've thought about it because I've run up against some more of those people who think going far is neither possible or good. As I look back over my life to this point, I recognize the presence of these people throughout my journey, but it seems they have been especially present over the last decade, with some of them showing up at their cowardly worst over the last few years. In the past few months, some of them have shown up again, reminding me of the fact they have no intention of blasting off into the unknown, and telling me I have no business thinking that I can or should either. One of the most dangerous things these people can do is to vilify those who dream of flight, of exploration and discovery. How selfish/short-sighted/cowardly must a person be who chooses to cover their own fear of the unknown by attacking those who decide that their own fears and uncertainties, no matter how deep they may be, will not keep them from boarding the rocket and strapping in for the ride of their lives? I guess the answer to the question would be, "very."

But, these ground-based critics always seem to gain an audience, and the audience appears to give credibility to the criticism leveled at those who long to see where the rocket will take them. And, no matter who you are or how thick-skinned you might be, the criticism does take a toll over time, especially when those who remain on the ground are convinced that those who they criticize can't feel pain. Or, even worse than that, they could care less about the pain their criticism inflicts. This week has reminded me of how my desire to be on the rocket is perceived as a threat by some people, a threat that in their minds must be contained, if not stamped out completely. To help me better understand this, my wife just this morning compared those of us who desire the adventure of the rocket with the critics and their choice to live their lives on a carousel. Even if there are those who appear to be in the "lead" positions on the carousel, she pointed out to me that they're still doing nothing but going in a circle, "leading" others nowhere. Given the context in which I want to fly, it also appears that the carousel stops every seven days for the "leaders" and their "followers" to celebrate how great it is to be on the carousel.

The point made by my wife that impacted me the most was the fact that in spite of my desire to go where the rocket may take me, I seem to still fall back into needing those on the carousel to give me their approval for being on the rocket in the first place. How ridiculous is that, looking to people who do whatever they can to keep me off of the rocket, as well as to keep the rocket itself on the ground, to finally celebrate me wanting to fly? Ridiculous indeed, and I thank God that once again my amazing wife has pointed out to me what should have already been obvious to me, but I somehow missed.

What is your rocket? What does adventure mean to you? Have you even asked yourself those questions? Or, did you once ask those questions, but have the critics on the carousel caused you to finally abandon your dreams and betray yourself so that you haven't given any thought in a long time to where the rocket might take you? One thing I know about the critics on the carousel...they will be no kinder or affirming to you even if you decide to jump on the carousel with them than they were when they perceived you as a threat to the security of their carousel culture. The more I live, the more I realize that the only people worthy of even hearing your dreams are those who actually know what it means to dream, who refuse to remain on the ground with the rest of those who tell themselves lies every day just to cope with the fact they stopped dreaming a long time ago. The people with whom you know you can share your dreams and who know they can share theirs with you are the ones who know that the small steps taken that lead to giant leaps are not taken on the ground, and most definitely not on the carousel of self-deceit and falsehood.

Plus, I've always thought the music played on those carousels was really lame and creepy.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Not Paying Attention

Last month the latest American Religious Identification Survey (ARIS) was released. USA Today did a cover story on the findings of the survey. In short, ARIS found that since 1990 almost every religious organization/movement in the United States has experienced slight or even moderate decline as a percentage of overall U.S. population (there were a few exceptions, two of which were Eastern religions and Islam, both of which showed 0.5% and 0.3% increases respectively).

For Christian organizations/movements, the news was almost all bad, with every major denomination or designation showing a loss from 1990-2008. Two groups showing slight increases were the Pentecostal/Charismatic designation, which showed an increase of 0.3% and those groups classified as "Protestant," but not "Mainline Protestant," with an increase of 0.5%.

The two largest Christian groups in America, Catholic and Baptist, both showed decreases. The group that showed the largest increase was the group identified as the "Nones," meaning those who claim no religious affiliation whatsoever. This group comprised 8.2% of the population in 1990. According to ARIS, as of last year the "Nones" now make up 15% of the U.S. population, an increase of 6.8% in the last 18 years. 15% of the population of the United States of America claim no faith system whatsoever. That's pretty stunning.

As I read the article I couldn't help but wonder how the church community would respond to these findings. I will admit I cringed when I speculated about what some of those responses would be, responses I was sure would only show us to be that much further removed from our present-day culture, as well as continuing to show contempt for the very culture to which we claim to have been sent with the transformational message of Jesus Christ. I waited for the evangelical backlash, both among many people I know, as well as from those who are expected to speak publicly when information like ARIS is released. I prayed this wouldn't be one more bloody battle in the culture war so many Christians seem to think somehow furthers the message of Jesus. I waited...and waited...and waited.

Nothing, not a peep. Not a single, "Hey did you see that ridiculous article in USA Today?" Not a single, " I knew this country was going to hell. I can't wait for Jesus to come back and get us out of here!" Nothing. And, since the study was released almost a month ago, I believe I've waited long enough for this survey to make an impact at least on people's conversations. And still, nothing. Nothing against the survey or in defense of it, nothing that sounds like why we should blame the "lost" for their "lostness." Nothing. The silence has been deafening.

So, what is it then to which most American Christians are paying attention? What actually matters to those who claim allegiance to a Savior who told His followers right before He left to cover the world with His message, making new followers of Him everywhere they went? Whatever this latest survey has to say to the Church, it appears we're too busy doing other things to listen. It also appears we're too busy doing things other than following the words of Jesus that have come to be known as His "Great Commission."

Could it be that our pursuit of our "best life now" has us too busy to consider our role in today's fulfillment of that Great Commission? Could it be that many American Christians are so ticked about the fact their guy didn't get into the White House in November that they're just too busy listening to Limbaugh, O'Reilly and Hannity tell them how change all of that in 2012, leaving them no time to get to know their non-Christ-following neighbors, co-workers, and family members in a way that might actually lead to serious discussion about spirituality? Could it be our eschatology is so messed up that we're actually celebrating the fact things are so difficult in our world right now, expecting Jesus to come back and get us out of this mess any moment, ignoring our call to be people of love, justice, mercy, people who are known to focus on those things that are "of a good report?"

While I'm speculating here, I don't think I'm far off the mark in my speculation. The reason the Christian faith is declining in America has nothing to do with those in America who are not Christians. It has everything to do with the fact that many American Christians stopped following Jesus a long time ago, settling for an Americanized idea of Him instead, one that assures our success, happiness, and comfort. This Jesus doesn't exist, and the culture knows He doesn't. I believe they might actually be willing to consider following the real Jesus, if they could actually ever get a look at Him.

How they get a look at Him will be up to Him, as it seems His Church is too busy not paying attention.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Rest

Not much to say tonight, mainly 'cause I'm exhausted. The last few weeks have been a whirlwind for sure. Some very high highs, and some very deep lows, with the requisite amount of ridiculous thrown in from some people who have no idea who I am, but are convinced that they do. I think it's all sort of piled up on me, and I've found myself the last few days sort of waiting for someone to tell me I can take an extended time-out. I've needed that time-out for a few years now, and I've been waiting almost as long for someone to insist I take it. Maybe I've been waiting on no one else but myself.

Anyway, I guess all I'm saying is that I'm tired, tired to the bone.

Rest. It sounds so nice. I think I remember what it's like. I hope to remember it again soon.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Of Blood And Hope

Last month I wrote about being finished with "it," and that I would write later about just what "it" was. "It" is my first book, which is titled STAND. It is a short allegory about an unnamed character who accepts an invitation to begin a journey that brings her both great heartbreak and great transformation. Seems you can't have one without the other. I knew for quite a long time that I was supposed to write a book, but my journey over the last few years, along with an invitation from my good friend Kim Green, showed me last year that I was at the point of making that first book come to life.

One of my favorite writers, Frederick Buechner, wrote many years ago that the writing process was very simple. "You just sit down at your typewriter and open up a vein." The first time I read that quote, it scared me to death, because something inside me was telling me that not only was it true, but that one day I'd know for myself just how true it was. I in no way consider myself anywhere close to being the writer that Buechner is, but I now know the truth of his words, the truth of the process, the truth of pages covered in blood, as well as in hope.

Writing a book, much less telling people that you've written one, seems to be both a simultaneously egocentric and terrifying experience. But it only seems to be those things for a short while. It has become for me more and more an experience of being a good steward of not only any communication gifts I may have been given, but more importantly a good steward of my journey, my story. It seems that all any of us really have to offer each other is our journey and the story that journey produces. It's always surprising to me how some people can't even tell the truth of their story to themselves, much less anyone else. These are the people who level the greatest criticism at those who dare tell the truth of their journey. I've experienced that same criticism in just the short time since STAND has been in print. I don't live in a vanilla, sanitized world. It's a shame that some do, especially since that world doesn't even exist.

I wrote STAND for those who live in the world of color, even when those colors are only black and grey. Maybe it's the black and the grey that produces the opening of the vein about which Buechner has written. But I also believe hope can live even in the middle of our being surrounded by black and grey. If we've known other colors at some point, that knowledge allows us to pour hope over the blood that soaks the pages of our stories. I don't know what color that combination makes, but it's definitely not vanilla.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Home

I spent this past weekend with a great group of people who had come together for a spiritual retreat outside of Chattanooga, Tenn. It was definitely an amazing time and I was honored to be part of it. A very close friend of mine led the weekend, and she gave me such a wonderful gift by asking me to take a leadership role with her for the event. Some very important, truly transformational things happened for me during this weekend, things that involved new beginnings, taking important next steps in on-going processes, as well as bringing an end to something that had finally reached its expiration date. I'll write more about some of this in the coming days, but it just seemed important to note how important both this weekend and the months of preparation leading up to it were and are to me.

All of that makes coming home last night that much sweeter. The lights on my front porch, the quiet of our house, being greeted by Zach the cat and Maggie the Labrador, feeling the warmth of your own bed, made all the better by the warmth of your wife next to you...these things are also gifts from this weekend, made that much sweeter by having been away from them.

Home.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Out the door

I'm out for a few days speaking at a retreat that begins tonight. Prayers are appreciated, as I'll be speaking several times over the course of the weekend. Hope your weekend goes well.

Peace,

Jerry

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Big Change

In 2005 I sat in an American mega-church, listening to one of it's founding pastors kick off a two-day conference they were hosting. His talk that evening was, "Are you ready to make the big change." He talked about how most church "leaders" avoided making big, sweeping changes, as this was usually the stuff that got people upset, and God knows we can't have the righteous assemblage getting upset...especially since that tends to lead to that pastor needing to find a new group to "lead." The pastor I listened to that evening, however, referred to what most pastors call change as anything but. "Slow, incremental change will kill you," he said. "It drains resources, passion and vision, plus it will frustrate the people who are actually depending on you to step up and lead."

As I sat there, I realized that the guy on stage was talking to me, and I've never forgotten what he said that night. He inspired me to both seek and create that which is truly change, as well as to begin to speak out against the small, cosmetic adjustments that most American pastors celebrate as change.

I've been surprised in the almost 4 years since that night how many times I've heard somebody refer to the "Big Change" they're making at their church. All this talk of change would be funny if it weren't so pathetic and self-congratulatory. So, I'd like to offer a few things that are definitely NOT "Big Change," as well as a few ideas about what it might actually be.

Big Change is NOT your brand new video screens in your worship space.
Big Change is NOT the fact your worship band plays a song from U2, Coldplay, Snow Patrol, The Killers, or whoever else it is you think will raise your cool factor. Playing songs from these bands means you're playing much better music than most churches do, but it does not qualify you for Big Change status.
Big Change is NOT the fact your entire staff wears jeans...it just means you're being smarter with your clothing purchases.
Big Change is NOT your coffee bar...although Bad Change would be removing the coffee.
Big Change is NOT devoting 90-95% of your financial and human resources to 2% of the week, be it Saturday night or Sunday morning.
Big Change is NOT bragging about how much money you send half-way around the world, while the neighborhood surrounding your church campus has no idea who you are or if you even remotely care that they live daily on the edge of hopelessness.
Big Change is NOT celebrating how much you do for the poor when that amount doesn't even equal 5% of your overall annual receipts.
Big Change is NOT adopting phrases like "post-modern," especially since post-moderns aren't even talking about post-modernism anymore. Showing up 10 years too late to the party is worse than not even showing up at all.

There are many other things I could list that are NOT Big Change, but I'm sure you get the point. Now, for a few ideas on those things that might actually be Big Change:

Calling our faith communities to begin to actually live out Jesus' words about bringing good news to the poor might be Big Change.
Being known for caring about more than just 2 political/social issues might be Big Change.
Abandoning the patriarchal, top-heavy leadership structures based on 1950's corporate America that almost all churches utilize might be Big Change.
Caring for the baby after it's born, as well as the mother who decided to take our advice and not abort him/her, might be Big Change.
Stopping our excuses as to why we can't do the previous things I've listed here and instead begin living like people who actually follow the teachings of Jesus might be Big Change.

I'm sure you could list many other things that would fit in either list, but I'm far more interested in what "might be" than that which is definitely NOT. I'm especially interested in how "might be" can then move to "should be" and then "will be," which finally simply becomes Big Change. I'm interested in doing this now and I'm interested in doing it with you.

If we agree on even a little bit of this, that in itself just might be Big Change.

Monday, February 16, 2009

The Fire Pit

Last night I sat around a fire pit with five young college students, as well as a good friend who has been out of college for over a decade now. My two-plus decades of post-college life definitely made me the oldest one in the circle. These young men asked both my friend and me to spend some time hanging out with them and discussing what the Church is and isn't, how to escape the institutional fraud masquerading as the Church, as well as what the future ministry implications are for each of them if they become part of the institution in hopes of bringing real life and change to it. Just small stuff like that.

We let them know quickly that we were not the guys with the answers, looking every bit as much to them as they might be to us for insight, wisdom, and hope. These guys got to the heart of the matter immediately, letting us know their hopes and their fears right off the bat. We talked about what it means to re-frame our internal struggles, about the need to use our own language to describe mission, rather than using the very problematic and polarizing language handed down to us. We talked about the fact that the Spirit is moving in some pretty unexpected places, places that might very well make those working to prop up the institution pretty nervous.

All of us in the circle share the same faith-tribe connection, if not life-long, at least currently, and we all admitted that particular stream is contributing little to nothing to this type of discussion. Maybe it's not even supposed to. At least a couple of these young men talked about how they would not be satisfied with identifying the problems with which we are faced; they want to be part of the solution. They NEED to be part of the solution. Calling was referred to quite often, and the last thing I remember saying to them had to do with crisis and the opportunities it presents.

What we probably spoke about most, though, and this is what made the evening so energizing for me as I drove away, was community. I almost hesitate to use the word, as it's been so over-used, misused, co-opted for less than honorable purposes, as well as having been attached to ministry initiatives that aren't even in the same universe as true community. But, last night we seemed to keep coming back to it, being reminded of how vital it is for things like the working out of one's salvation, the understanding and living out of calling, as well as simply making sure we live for something more and better than just ourselves. We talked so much about community because we were doing community, we were living out community in those couple of hours. Five twenty-somethings, one thirty-something and one forty-something, all of us sharing the same fire's warmth, all of us sharing much of the same hopes and dreams.

We were the Church covered in smoke, the Church becoming. We promised each other we will be doing this again and I believe we will. I look forward to being back with them at their fire pit soon. They have much to teach me.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Freedom

Friedrich Nietzsche wrote, "Do you call yourself free? I want to hear your ruling idea, and not that you have escaped from a yoke." In thinking about this statement, I understand what it's like to have escaped from a yoke, and how that escape can at least initially feel like freedom. I also understand the longing for freedom that a "ruling idea" can create. But, with apologies to Nietzsche, the presence of this ruling idea is not only insufficient proof of freedom, it in itself can become another yoke entirely, moving us from the tyranny of one type of domination to another.

The religious system in which I grew up and today now serve as a minister, is part of the Christian faith (the Church of God, based in Cleveland, Tennessee). Somehow, probably not intentionally, that system managed to turn a ruling idea into a yoke. Even worse than that, this ruling idea/yoke over time became this system's primary reason for being, having replaced the God to which it claimed allegiance with a single attribute of how He operates, or at least their opinion of how He operates, and even then, probably managing to be off-base about that very attribute. After over a century of existence, this system continues to hold to this ruling idea so tightly that it is willing to do whatever it thinks necessary to either keep its members in line (or in yoke) where the ruling idea is concerned, or to remove those members who are willing to either question or suggest that there needs to be a re-thinking of the ruling idea.

This is currently happening to a man with whom I have been acquainted for most of my life, and with whom I worked a few years ago. He's been a pastor in this particular faith system for quite a long time now, and has spent almost the last 33 years at the same church in Chattanooga, Tennessee, which in itself is a pretty uncommon thing, especially in our tribe. He's a bit different than many pastors in our tribe in that he is influenced by thinking beyond our tribe's rather narrow, provincial approach to the faith. This has caused him to be celebrated by some, scorned by others. But, he has always made it clear that the tribe to which he belongs is the tribe to which he wants to belong. It's his tribe, and he's glad to be part of it. You would think this would count for something, but evidently not. He's currently being accused of "doctrinal infidelity" (I think they mean heresy) over the fact he has dared question whether the ruling idea is something we should re-think, or at least allow room for some additional thinking on the subject. It's embarrassing to even admit what all this fuss is about, but here goes: it's all about speaking in tongues.

There you go. This man's entire life's work, as well as his standing in his denomination, not to mention his livelihood, is being put at risk over a disagreement about tongues. This might even be funny if it weren't so completely pathetic and terrifying. And the craziest thing about it is that the pastor to whom I'm referring believes in speaking in tongues! He just happens to have a different take on it than the ones who consider themselves the keepers of the yoke/ruling idea have. We're way past theology or doctrine here kids. We're way past dogma. We are now in the land of the cultish and the dangerous. Very dangerous.

It's important to point out that although I've known this pastor for some time, and even though we used to work together, the passion of my post doesn't stem from the fact I have a deep friendship with him. The time that I worked with him was difficult at best, and the aftermath of having worked with him has been equally difficult. The last time we spoke was well over a year ago, and that was strained and uncomfortable. I'm not speaking out because a friend is being targeted. I'm speaking out because this is wrong...this is ridiculous...this is not the way of Christ! Furthermore, if they can gut him over this, they can certainly do it to someone like myself who refuses to be identified by the labels and the doctrinal stances so many keepers of the yoke insist on. I told a friend who's in the same faith tribe just this week that the time to stand up and speak up about things like this has come. So, I guess I'm following my own advice.

In a recent conversation with another friend about this issue, I told him, "how ironic would it be if after all these decades of our denomination elevating speaking in tongues, the thing that brought about its end was a fight over speaking in tongues?" How ironic. How sad. If these keepers of the ruling idea do in fact take this particular Chattanooga pastor down, I am fully confident that he will find a way to overcome what they've done to him and he will do his best to move forward. For those who will have done this to him, it is my sincere hope that the weight of the very yoke they insist the members of the tribe live under will crush them and their idolatrous ways. They know nothing of freedom and seem to want no one else to either. But, freedom is neither a yoke or an idea.

And where the Spirit is, there is freedom.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Finished

It's finished. I wish I could tell you what "it" is, but I can't just yet. That's another month away. For now though, let it suffice that it has been in the works for quite a long time, long before I actually began working on it, before I even knew what it was. It had been working on and in me for years, just waiting for me to finally get to the place where I could recognize it for what it is, as well as understand that it's time had come. Or maybe my time had come. Either way, it was time for it.

These past few years have heavily influenced the beginning and completion of it, but I realize now that my whole life has been helping to form this time and this project. You know how you have that small, hidden space down inside that says maybe, just maybe I could someday do this thing or that thing, but there's also that other space in you, maybe not as hidden or small that keeps wanting to tell you all you will never do. This time, the small space won.

Here's to hoping yours does too.

Monday, January 19, 2009

The Prophet

He was someone who was on television a lot, but a person who so many people in my world seemed to dislike, maybe even hate. He didn't seem like a guy who needed to be hated, but hatred was one of the things that followed him around. He was a black preacher from Atlanta who spent a lot of time talking about freedom and rights, about justice and equality. The preachers of my culture just talked about sin, how angry God was with most of us, and how we all couldn't wait to get out of this world and into the next one...where we could have one long, never-ending church service. Welcome to Heaven.

But this black preacher from Atlanta seemed to have an idea that God might just be a bit more interested in the here and now than my preachers thought He was. All the preachers from my world were white, however, so that made the black preacher wrong, maybe even not a true follower of God. The South in the 60's. What a wasteland. Tons of religion, little to no righteousness.

Someone (or a group of them, depending on which conspiracy school you belong to) finally shut the black preacher from Atlanta down on a Memphis motel balcony in '68, but not before he had stood on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial on a sweltering August day in '63 and told the audience, the nation, and the world that he had a dream. It was a dream that was meant for "all God's children," and it sounded kind of like some of the words Jesus used, but those words were typically overlooked by the preachers of my world. Freedom for the captive....good news for the poor, stuff like that. He stood there that day in '63 and called a nation, the world really, to return to true humanity, where we each are valued and each of us matter because all of us matter.

His words that day inspired millions, both that day and the days that immediately followed, as well as in the years to follow. The inspired ones included the man from Texas who occupied the White House at the time, later a young rock band from the north side of Dublin who sang about all that he did in the name of love, as well as a young preacher's son who grew up in the unrighteous South of the 60's...me.

Today we remember that black Atlanta preacher, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., and all that he meant and means to us. And tomorrow in Washington, D.C., we will remember that his dream continues, as a man becomes president who would have never had a chance at it had Dr. King never dared to dream and then dare to share that dream with the rest of us. Tomorrow will be a great day, and I have to believe that on that hot August day in '63, the black preacher from Atlanta saw it. Had he shared with us then what he saw waiting for us tommorrow, I'm sure we would have all said he was crazy, but then we tend to respond that way to most prophets.

Monday, January 12, 2009

The Current

Almost 2 years since my last post here. There are lots of reasons for that, some of which include the intensity of life, my own internal struggles, as well as the general feeling that I might not have anything to say. I've actually had to lots to say, and I guess I've said some of it, just not here. Anyway, what's been said or hasn't been said doesn't matter much at this point.

My last post here came after sitting on the bank of the Mississippi in Minneapolis on a Sunday afternoon, taking in all the life being lived around me, as well as the life I was living at the time. A lot of living has happened since, just not the kind I really wanted to participate in. But, lived in it and through it I have, and just like the current of the Mississippi that presented itself to me that April day, my own current has continued to move and to take me where I needed to go, even if I haven't always agreed with where it's taken me, or where it has me right now.

I just recently finished a project (more on that in March) that required me to think a great deal about standing, about moving and about how this river called life refuses to cooperate with my occasional complacency, fear or desire that all my dreams and goals just fall into place for me, and that they all fall into place NOW. I realize this sounds very simple, but I think most of life is...I didn't say easy, but simple. Life is simply about choices, the choices we make about both our opportunities and our challenges, as well as the choices we make about our responses when our initial choices don't necessarily work out the way we intended or hoped that they would. Maybe those choices make up the current to which I'm referring, the things that take us to previously uninhabited places. These are the places we could not have seen and experienced without stepping into the current that responds to our choices, but that isn't governed by them. My journey on this river is an outcome of how I've responded to the amazing opportunities and the crushing disappointments that have met me at an earlier spot along the river.

So, 2 years later I continue to watch the river do what only it can do and I continue to be moved by it and down it. So much has happened since that day in Minneapolis and so much hasn't happened. I have experienced many things I didn't expect or want, and I continue to wait on things that I am convinced are way overdue. But, I am in the current. I continue the journey along the river that changes everything. I am alive.